I hated my father

Be happy or unhappy is a choice, not is fatality. What you do with your good or bad experiences will define your reality. I learned this with life. My father used extreme physical and psychological violence, destroying my self-esteem. I grew up insecure, frightened, thinking it was the worst living being on the planet. The dogmas of the Church ended me sinking into bitterness and guilt, killing me slowly. Very young, went into severe depression, lost the will to live, until I thought about suicide – I had arrived the end of the line. Or I was crazy or gave an end in my life. Chose an option more difficult. I resolved to continue a life of truth. I dived on the inner path, trying to understand what was behind my physical and psychological symptoms. I studied many psychology books, learned to meditate, found lightness in Yoga, drank Ayahuasca (sacred tea of the Amazonian Indians) going deeper in my self-knowledge, I faced my monsters, took the reins of the traumas, avoiding to take me to the hole - I stopped to be victim and a new sun shone on me.

If your life is a chaos and traumas prevent you to be completely happy. If your self-esteem is garbage and made ​​you feel that your life is good for nothing. Get out of your comfortable sadness zone. Stop feeling sorry for yourself. Wake up! Life is too short! Do not keep sorrows, they only serve to impede you to live! Don’t identify more with the suffering, it will destroy you entirely!

When I forgave my father many years after his death, liberated me to enjoy every day with maximum pleasure. The pain became bitter medicine that was sweet, the obscure sadness in luminous metamorphosis.